Silent Sunday 29.12.13
Sunday, 29 December 2013
Saturday, 14 December 2013
Tough Love
This week has been a tough learning curve for The Whirlwind. I have finally come to the end of my tether with his total lack of organisation and assumptions that he can call me at the drop of a hat and I will come to his rescue in any situation he may of put himself in. I'm not talking about dangerous scenarios which of course would be a different story, as I wouldn't hesitate to charge to his rescue like a Ninja with PMT. I am talking about homework and general school stuff.
Let me give you a brief run down of his forgetful week...................................
Monday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Monday 8.45am
Phone rings
Him "Mum, I've forgotten my P.E kit"
Me " OK don't worry, I will drop it up to you" I happily reply.
Tuesday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Tuesday 8.45am
Phone rings
Him "Mum, is my homework on the fridge"?
Me "Yes it is"
Him "Can you drop it in or I will get a detention"
Me (like a sap) "OK, on my way".
Wednesday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Wednesday .......No Phone Call = Progress
Wednesday Evening 10.10pm
Him "Muuumm, I have Food Tech and have to cook Paella"
Me "When"?
Him "Tomorrow"
This resulted in a mad dash to the supermarket in the morning to get ingredients............I know, I know................................Total soft touch.
Thursday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Thursday - No Phone Call
Thursday 3.45pm
Me "Where's you Paella"?
Him "Oh, we didn't cook it as the ovens were broken"
Me "What......Where are the ingredients then"?
Him "I've left them at school".
That's when I made a decision.................................No more nice Mummy....................This was war............
Friday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him " Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Friday 8.45am
Him "Muummmm, I need a newspaper and I've left my P.E kit and there's a piece of homework on my desk. Can you pop them up please"?
Me............................"NO.......ENJOY YOUR DETENTION......LOVE YOU"!!!!
Its now 2.25pm on Friday afternoon and I haven't heard a word from him, I would imagine he stood opened mouthed for a while staring at the phone wondering if I was going to call back and tell him I was only joking. I am waiting for the front door to fly open and a slightly hormonal pissed off 12 year old to come charging in....................................Do I care?........................Am I scared (a bit)?........................................NO I DO NOT!!!..................Its called Tough Love and although hes not going to enjoy it I am loving every minute of it.......
Let me give you a brief run down of his forgetful week...................................
Monday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Monday 8.45am
Phone rings
Him "Mum, I've forgotten my P.E kit"
Me " OK don't worry, I will drop it up to you" I happily reply.
Tuesday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Tuesday 8.45am
Phone rings
Him "Mum, is my homework on the fridge"?
Me "Yes it is"
Him "Can you drop it in or I will get a detention"
Me (like a sap) "OK, on my way".
Wednesday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Wednesday .......No Phone Call = Progress
Wednesday Evening 10.10pm
Him "Muuumm, I have Food Tech and have to cook Paella"
Me "When"?
Him "Tomorrow"
This resulted in a mad dash to the supermarket in the morning to get ingredients............I know, I know................................Total soft touch.
Thursday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him "Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Thursday - No Phone Call
Thursday 3.45pm
Me "Where's you Paella"?
Him "Oh, we didn't cook it as the ovens were broken"
Me "What......Where are the ingredients then"?
Him "I've left them at school".
That's when I made a decision.................................No more nice Mummy....................This was war............
Friday 8.30am
Me "Have you got everything"?
Him " Yep"
Me "Are you 100% sure you have everything"?
Him "Yep".
Friday 8.45am
Him "Muummmm, I need a newspaper and I've left my P.E kit and there's a piece of homework on my desk. Can you pop them up please"?
Me............................"NO.......ENJOY YOUR DETENTION......LOVE YOU"!!!!
Its now 2.25pm on Friday afternoon and I haven't heard a word from him, I would imagine he stood opened mouthed for a while staring at the phone wondering if I was going to call back and tell him I was only joking. I am waiting for the front door to fly open and a slightly hormonal pissed off 12 year old to come charging in....................................Do I care?........................Am I scared (a bit)?........................................NO I DO NOT!!!..................Its called Tough Love and although hes not going to enjoy it I am loving every minute of it.......
Wednesday, 11 December 2013
Random Thoughts of a Stressed Out Housewife.
This is the first time I have written a post like this...............................................Its not normal for me to have nothing to say but on this occasion that is exactly what I find myself doing...........................................Nothing......................................I honestly cannot think of anything to blog about. "Just write" my inner Mojo tells me............................."Anything" he says "No matter how random the subject is"........................"OK Then" I reply...............................................
1.When writing Christmas cards to couples who have 4 billion children do I write each name or To Maureen, Dave and Family???????? To be honest I hate writing cards and have discovered that other people feel the same, I know this because today I have received 6 Virtual Christmas Cards on Facebook. I am seriously thinking of including a note in each card saying that this will be the last year I send cards and will be donating to charity instead next year. Does that make me a meanie or is it just a sign of the times??
2. I am fat..................................This has been confirmed today when I commented to an elderly lady waiting to cross the road that it was a really chilly day.................Her reply was "I wouldn't imagine you feel much of the cold dear being the size you are"................................................................I thought about shoving her under a passing bus but remembered it was Christmas soon and I didn't really want to spend it in a police cell. Maybe she was commenting on my height...............................Who am I kidding.....................I need to go on a diet in the new year.
3. I know all the words to most Barry Manilow songs..........................................................How can this be when I can walk into a room and forget what on earth I am doing there. I even surprise myself with the sheer perfection at knowing each and every "Ooh" and "Ahhhh" to Copacabana.
4. Has Cliff Richards been cryogenically frozen and is just defrosted each Christmas to sing for us. I am wondering this as he is on TV at the moment looking about 40, either that or he has found a fantastic moisturiser....................What's your secret Cliff............................You can tell me, I wont tell a soul.
5. Should I attempt to finish this gigantic bag of M&M's all by myself.......................................I do feel a little bit sick but its like they are throwing themselves into my mouth..............
Random enough for you Mojo???......................................................................
Hopefully I will be back in the full swing of it soon and will continue to lighten your days. Until then folks.........................................
Love
Me
xxxx
1.When writing Christmas cards to couples who have 4 billion children do I write each name or To Maureen, Dave and Family???????? To be honest I hate writing cards and have discovered that other people feel the same, I know this because today I have received 6 Virtual Christmas Cards on Facebook. I am seriously thinking of including a note in each card saying that this will be the last year I send cards and will be donating to charity instead next year. Does that make me a meanie or is it just a sign of the times??
2. I am fat..................................This has been confirmed today when I commented to an elderly lady waiting to cross the road that it was a really chilly day.................Her reply was "I wouldn't imagine you feel much of the cold dear being the size you are"................................................................I thought about shoving her under a passing bus but remembered it was Christmas soon and I didn't really want to spend it in a police cell. Maybe she was commenting on my height...............................Who am I kidding.....................I need to go on a diet in the new year.
3. I know all the words to most Barry Manilow songs..........................................................How can this be when I can walk into a room and forget what on earth I am doing there. I even surprise myself with the sheer perfection at knowing each and every "Ooh" and "Ahhhh" to Copacabana.
4. Has Cliff Richards been cryogenically frozen and is just defrosted each Christmas to sing for us. I am wondering this as he is on TV at the moment looking about 40, either that or he has found a fantastic moisturiser....................What's your secret Cliff............................You can tell me, I wont tell a soul.
5. Should I attempt to finish this gigantic bag of M&M's all by myself.......................................I do feel a little bit sick but its like they are throwing themselves into my mouth..............
Random enough for you Mojo???......................................................................
Hopefully I will be back in the full swing of it soon and will continue to lighten your days. Until then folks.........................................
Love
Me
xxxx
Sunday, 8 December 2013
Sunday, 1 December 2013
"Is Santa Real"
"Is Santa Real"? Its the moment we as parents dread....................................................................I can remember exactly the moment The Teenager asked me that very question.
She was 12, Mr DG was brushing his teeth and I was in the shower............................See, I told you I could remember.
The morning was going quite well until Mr DG suddenly realised that we had forgotten to give the Tooth Fairy a hand by subbing her £2 to go under The Whirlwinds pillow the previous night. "OH CRAP" he exclaimed rather loudly realising his mistake. "Quick" I replied "Do it now.....They are both still asleep"....................................WRONG............................The door burst open and in child number 1 (who had all her big teeth I might add so it really wasn't any of her business) came.................."WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHOVE IT UNDER THERE NOW"................................"ISN'T THE TOOTH FAIRY REAL"?.................................It was at this point we both pretended we hadn't heard her and carried on with our ablutions. "Mum....Dad........Isn't the Tooth Fairy Real" a little voice said.
I cannot begin to tell you how awful I felt as I watched her little eyes fill with sadness. To be fair I was super impressed that we had got all the way to 12 without any suspicion. Then before I had time to answer the dreaded question plopped out of her mouth, the one where you are never quite prepared............................................................"Does that mean Santa isn't real either"?????
There it was............................................Those words.............................Like a knife to the heart...................................This is it................................................................Choose your words carefully Mummy........................
I sat her down away from child number 2 who was luckily oblivious to the whole fiasco and looked her square in the eyes.................................................."OK, here's the thing" I began.
"Who wants cake for breakfast" Mr DG chipped in with hoping to avoid any confrontation.
"ME ME ME" screamed child 2
"Nobody is having cake for breakfast" I scolded "Right" I began again as child number 2 ran down the kitchen to see if he really could have cake for breakfast.
This is the speech that I gave her pretty much word for word.....................................
"Now that you are such a big girl there will be a lot of people that will tell you that Santa isn't real and that it is babyish to believe in him. I have never seen him but I know that on Christmas Eve something magical happens and a kind of calm blankets the whole world. People laugh and even the saddest of people cant help but smile on Christmas Eve. I don't care what people think as I believe in the magic of Christmas and know that something is definitely different on that day. If you don't want to think that Santa and all his traditions are real then that's fine but I will never stop believing.
Some day you will have your own children and I hope that all the fun things Daddy and I have done over those special days will stay with you and you too will carry on the magical things that happen."
I had tears in my eyes as I looked at my little girls innocence slipping away right in front of me, I truly believed everything I had told her and hoped in my heart that she would too.
"Thank God for that" was her reply
"I don't have to worry about some fat bloke breaking into our house anymore" she concluded. And with that she kissed me on the top of the head before whispering "Don't worry, I wont tell" with a wink and a swish of her dressing gown she was off down the stairs.
I sat there stunned, not sure how to react. Then............................................."MUUUMMMMMYYYY DADDY'S MADE CAKE FOR BREAKFAST"............................Good old Dad.
I am 43 years old now and still find a little present from Santa under my tree when everyone has gone on Christmas Day. I have no idea how it gets there but somehow it does and I look forward to it every year.
When you reach that stage where it isn't cool for your kids to believe anymore just remember this..............................Its up to you to keep the magic alive so that they will grow up with it in their hearts and pass it on.
Happy Christmas Everyone
xxxxxxx
She was 12, Mr DG was brushing his teeth and I was in the shower............................See, I told you I could remember.
The morning was going quite well until Mr DG suddenly realised that we had forgotten to give the Tooth Fairy a hand by subbing her £2 to go under The Whirlwinds pillow the previous night. "OH CRAP" he exclaimed rather loudly realising his mistake. "Quick" I replied "Do it now.....They are both still asleep"....................................WRONG............................The door burst open and in child number 1 (who had all her big teeth I might add so it really wasn't any of her business) came.................."WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHOVE IT UNDER THERE NOW"................................"ISN'T THE TOOTH FAIRY REAL"?.................................It was at this point we both pretended we hadn't heard her and carried on with our ablutions. "Mum....Dad........Isn't the Tooth Fairy Real" a little voice said.
I cannot begin to tell you how awful I felt as I watched her little eyes fill with sadness. To be fair I was super impressed that we had got all the way to 12 without any suspicion. Then before I had time to answer the dreaded question plopped out of her mouth, the one where you are never quite prepared............................................................"Does that mean Santa isn't real either"?????
There it was............................................Those words.............................Like a knife to the heart...................................This is it................................................................Choose your words carefully Mummy........................
I sat her down away from child number 2 who was luckily oblivious to the whole fiasco and looked her square in the eyes.................................................."OK, here's the thing" I began.
"Who wants cake for breakfast" Mr DG chipped in with hoping to avoid any confrontation.
"ME ME ME" screamed child 2
"Nobody is having cake for breakfast" I scolded "Right" I began again as child number 2 ran down the kitchen to see if he really could have cake for breakfast.
This is the speech that I gave her pretty much word for word.....................................
"Now that you are such a big girl there will be a lot of people that will tell you that Santa isn't real and that it is babyish to believe in him. I have never seen him but I know that on Christmas Eve something magical happens and a kind of calm blankets the whole world. People laugh and even the saddest of people cant help but smile on Christmas Eve. I don't care what people think as I believe in the magic of Christmas and know that something is definitely different on that day. If you don't want to think that Santa and all his traditions are real then that's fine but I will never stop believing.
Some day you will have your own children and I hope that all the fun things Daddy and I have done over those special days will stay with you and you too will carry on the magical things that happen."
I had tears in my eyes as I looked at my little girls innocence slipping away right in front of me, I truly believed everything I had told her and hoped in my heart that she would too.
"Thank God for that" was her reply
"I don't have to worry about some fat bloke breaking into our house anymore" she concluded. And with that she kissed me on the top of the head before whispering "Don't worry, I wont tell" with a wink and a swish of her dressing gown she was off down the stairs.
I sat there stunned, not sure how to react. Then............................................."MUUUMMMMMYYYY DADDY'S MADE CAKE FOR BREAKFAST"............................Good old Dad.
I am 43 years old now and still find a little present from Santa under my tree when everyone has gone on Christmas Day. I have no idea how it gets there but somehow it does and I look forward to it every year.
When you reach that stage where it isn't cool for your kids to believe anymore just remember this..............................Its up to you to keep the magic alive so that they will grow up with it in their hearts and pass it on.
Happy Christmas Everyone
xxxxxxx
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