Missing In Action

You may of noticed I have been a little quiet of late...........Mr DG would see this as a bonus.............There has been a jolly good reason behind my absence.............................WE HAVE MOVED HOUSE.................Oh yes indeedy. And, being the super duper superstitious person I am there was no way I could tempt fate and write about it.

But now.................................I can............................And boy can I tell you a few stories about the whole process of putting your home on the market, finding somewhere else and then the debacle of actually moving a whole 15 years of stuff to another place.

They say that moving is one of the most stressful experiences you will ever go through and I whole heartedly agree..................Never, ever again. Having complete strangers marching through your home was quite frankly like being a chimp in a glass enclosure and I had some real corkers......................Here are my top 5 viewings.

1. Mum, Dad, Kid 1 (high on orange crisps and blue sweets), Kid 2 ( clearly traumatised by the whole experience). Kid 1 decided to jump on all the beds whilst shouting that he could fart in time to his bounces, Kid 2 still crying and now climbing up Dads leg to sit on his shoulders, Mum oblivious to whole chaotic scene and was just interested in how much I would sell my curtains for.


2. Man, Woman, Teenager.................Man decided to open all my wardrobes to see how much space there was, Woman decided that she would take this opportunity to comment on all my clothes and enquire where I purchased them all from. Teenager couldn't of cared less if they lived here or in a tent and was only slightly enamoured when he realised it had a garage round the corner for his "band".







3. Older couple - Spent a whole hour walking round making all the right noises only to tell me as they left that they were actually looking for 4 bedrooms and needed space for 3 cars........Apparently they had lost the ability to read the particulars that the estate agent had lovingly prepared for them. They then proceeded to sit in their car for a further hour with a picnic hamper and a flask of tea.

4. Single Man - Divorced..........And didn't I know it, think I should of charged him a Therapist rate as he sat for ages telling me what a cow she was and how much money she had got out of the divorce. I don't even think he looked at the house and welled up every time he saw something that reminded him or her.........."My Ex used to have a mirror like that"........."My ex loved that perfume"..........."My ex had that shampoo"........"My ex had a vagina".........OK, he didn't really say that last one but you get the drift.

5. Young couple - Very nice at first but this quickly descended into them having a full blown argument about whether they could actually afford the house in the first place and how they was no way she was going to live with his mother. When he enquired why she felt like this she explained that his mother was in her delicate words a "BITCH"..............Once again my therapy skills came into play as I explained that we had lived with Mr DG's mum and that it was a Godsend to have the opportunity to save up some money so we could afford to buy our first place. This didn't seem to help and she stomped off leaving a very red face man not quite knowing what the heck was going on.



I could go on but to be honest we had some right nutters looking round,and it would take up a whole post to tell you about them all, the trouble is you have to show them all. In amongst the riff raff there might be someone who is genuinely interested and wants to buy your beloved home.................................And, there was.

A gorgeous young couple who are having their first baby this year, she fell in love with the house by the time she had made it through the porch and within 15 minutes it was obvious they were going to buy it.

So, 8 weeks later they did and we moved our family, possessions and life 5 minutes up the other end of town to our dream home...................

I am just getting used to the extra space and am trying to except that its not a holiday home and that it is in fact our forever home.

Would I ever do it again....................Not unless I can be put into an induced state and woken up when its all over.

Nice to be back

Lots of Love
Me xxx