Monday 28 April 2014

Which Playground Parent Are You ??

Now that my kids are Teenagers I thought it would be highly unlikely that I would ever venture into that daunting world of the Primary School playground again........Well....Until I become a Granny then I shall be back.

Anyway, last week a friend of mine asked me if I would pick up her little one from a local school.................Not, I must add my kids old school but another one. Without a moments hesitation I jumped at the chance and made sure I was there in plenty of time to see her coming out. Whilst standing there feeling a bit like a spare part at a wedding I noticed how many different types of parents there really are........................Why had I never noticed this when mine were small? Where had all these different personalities come from ? And more importantly.....Which one did I fit into??

Here are my different types of Playground Parent.................Which one are you??

1. The "I have no interest in being your friend" ... This type will usually sit on the end of a bench (not a friendship one), wear dark sunglasses and avoid all eye contact with you. If a conversation is initiated you will normally find she/he will answer in one word. She is not interested in playground gossip and does certainly not want to talk about your child.

2.  The "Mean Girl Group"..........A particularly difficult species to infiltrate. Will usually be found in a group with an invisible force field around them and a sign that says "Don't bother" placed on the ground....OK............Maybe not the sign but definitely the force field. They will whisper and take over the shoulder looks at you until you either leave the playground crying or give them the finger.

3. The "Bragger".......An annoying specimen who will tell everyone in a very loud voice how many certificates little Johnny has got this term and how he is in "Every" top group in school........They will then go onto advising you on how you should be parenting so that you to can have a perfect child...........You will normally find that little Johnny is off somewhere terrorising another child.

4. The "Turn a Blind Eye and It will all go away" ....................................A particular pest in the playground who will actively ignore whatever their child is doing whether it be wrestling another child against their will or kicking a trash can over. The normal reaction is "I like my kids to be free and express themselves"...............Try telling that to the child that is in a head lock...

5.  The "Phone Junkies"........I have never seen this type in action before today but let me tell you....They are impressive....Not only can they text, email, Tweet and Instagram whilst holding a conversation and watching their kids but they can do it all with one hand..........And I am sure by the time they get home it will be on Facebook too.

6.  The "Social Butterfly"........Usually a PTA mummy who likes to say hello to everyone and lull them into a false sense of security before enlisting them on the committee........She/He is very good at getting you involved even if you don't really want to be.....She is even brave enough to take on the Mean Girls and The I Have No Interest type........Hang On.......................................Wait A minute.............................I was a PTA mum for 10 years......................I think I've found my type...

7. The "I'm Just A Mum/Dad"...........And then there's everybody else...............................These lovely souls don't fit into any of the above category and are happy to chat and giggle with everyone else. I think to be honest in my observations the groups above would secretly like to escape and join you.......................


My time spent in the playground was enlightening and haven't changed that much from when I was there. I guess in life there are different groups of people some nice and some not so nice but we all have one thing in common.....Whether we want to be there or not........................................We are......................................Just remember this............................................Your children are blank canvases, and its up to you to paint the best quality picture you can..........





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50 comments:

  1. I was a PTA mum too...I'd rather be that than a Bragger!

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  2. I used to be on the PTA so that one was me! Since leaving, I reckon I might be seen as the 'dark glasses' type....but I am actually just your regular mum, will talk to anyone but am not into the cliques. Am so over the school playground to be honest! Still have 2 years to go :(

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  3. The one in the dark glasses, just because people have kids doesn't mean we have anything in common. I try to have normal conversation with other parents but playdates? Moaning, who can worry about their kids health and safety the most, housework, no I would rather make friends through courses I know there's stuff to talk about. I'm not good at small talk.

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    1. Its great to meet people on courses, you are all there for the same reason.xx

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  4. I was a PTA mum too - left the PTA and changed school and now am just a loner as joined mid-term but quite enjoying it!! x I wrote about these groups before - you were much nicer about them though! I think I came under the bolshy lot! x

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  5. I'd like to think I'm more of a plain mom and a little bit of a social butterfly. I like getting involved in communities with parents of children that my kid hangs out with. Great coverage on the types of parents!

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  6. I am the last one! I find the playground very daunting. Elle is in early years so it is my first year. I have made friends with a few of them but i try and keep myself to myself as there are some very opinionated parents and the very loud ones too! I just talk to the few mums that i have gotten to know x

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    1. I think when you are new that's the best way to be Keri-Anne. xx

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  7. no matter how old you are, there's always cliques aren't there! can't please everyone eh :)

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    1. No you cant, some people never actually grow out of it do they xx

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  8. Oh I've seen all of these in the playground!! I think I am more the last one but could come under phone junkie lol

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    1. I am in awe of you oh great one......I only wish I could multitask like that. Thanks for reading hun xx

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  9. I was glad when my boys started walking too and from school. I can not handle the whole school playground thing at all!

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    1. I have to admit I did miss it for about 30 seconds but then rejoiced at not having to go in there xx

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  10. Can I add another one - this is me...I'm the pick-up and RUN Mum!! Get to the school as late as I can without being late, grab the kids and GO....try to avoid being dragged into any nasty discussion about a teacher or a child someone doesn't like etc etc I am friendly to everyone and I do have friends there who I will meet for coffee etc but the whole playground thing just feels me with dread!! Love this post, made me chuckle!!

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    1. Of course you can....I reckon you might be onto something here....What a great idea xxx

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  11. I got bullied at schools so just wanted to be left alone to get on with my work .x

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  12. eeeek! i;m glad I don't have to deal with the playground!

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  13. Recognise many of these - I was just a mum - still am! I always tried not to get involved in the playground politics! xx

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  14. im just a mum lol, well mum to 7 , always got plenty to say but really cant be chewed to even talk at the gates when the easy option is to quickly get them out of the riff raff and rioting kids running daft lol x

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    1. I can't imagine herding 7 of them out in one go. Hats off to you darling xx

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  15. Great observations and easier to make when you are 'visiting' a school and picking up a child other than your own :)

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  16. I'm just a mum with a little of Social butterfly :-) x

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  17. We have all this to come but it has already started at nursery. I suppose we can't all get along but it would be nice to think that we could.

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    1. It really would wouldn't it but I guess some people never grow out of that mentality xxx

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  18. My son is at preschool for a couple of mornings a week but then will be home educated so I'll be avoiding the playground. At the moment though, I'm the last type. My son has autism so we are the ones that don't get invited to parties or play dates. I smile and talk to people but most people blank us.

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    1. That is sad and mean.....Why are people so awful, I would be happy to have you and your little one to tea any time xxx

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  19. I am a phone junkie - but possibly with a touch of brag about me, but I do try not to.
    well done on the BiBs and best of luck.

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    1. Another phone junkie....remind me for a lesson at Britmums this year. Xxxx

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  20. I'm not a Mum but its always really interesting reading these posts - I guess in some ways we never grow out of our 'groups'.

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  21. I hate dropping my son off at nursery as it reminds me of being at school all over again!

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  22. I hate to admit it but I am a phone junkie crossed with a PTA mummy

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    1. I am in awe of you Kara.....can you do it single handily too......xxxx

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  23. Lucky, hardly anyone drops off or collects at the same time as me, at pre-school so all of this is yet to come.
    Amazing the phone ones you describe. So it's not just us bloggers that act like that? Ha ha.
    Liska xx

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  24. I am not a playground parent yet but I am hoping I will just be a "normal mum". X

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  25. Great post and well observed. I was the parent that stood on my own because Zak would scream as he couldn't cope in the playground

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  26. Haha this is brilliant - I am not a playground parent just yet but I think I will be the phone junkie loool

    Thanks for sharing
    Lotte xo
    Berice Baby – London Lifestyle & Kids Fashion Blog

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Love to hear your comments, and I will always try to reply xxx