Tuesday, 2 July 2013

The Royal Waiting Game

Can you believe the press are already jostling for places outside the London hospital where Wills and Kate might have their baby this week.....Or next week.....Or the week after....Or possibly the week after that.

This has left me wondering how she will get past them all without being noticed. Will she be puffing and panting with legs on the dashboard screaming at Wills to "SHUT THE HELL UP" (oh no.....That was just me) or will she be as regal as ever and just walk straight in without so much as a facial twitch during contractions. Will she have to wait for an anaesthetist or will she grab Wills by the collar and demand he goes out into the streets of London and score her some drugs (whoops....me again).

When I had The Teenager I convinced myself that I would look like a royal princess afterwards and a fanfare would sound out through the streets as she emerged into the world. Unfortunately this wasn't to be and I actually looked like more like Stig of the Dump and the only fanfares were those of sirens as a squad of police cars zoomed past my window.

I would love to be a fly on the wall and watch this momentous birth (come on One Born Every Minute get your act together), I would love to see how a royal birth differs from ours. Will Charles and Camilla be pacing outside in the family room drinking vending machine coffee..................Will Harry be off wetting the baby's head from the moment she goes into labour until the baby is 2................................Will Queeny knit some booties and a matching hat and more importantly will Kate's mums party company provide all the bunting and balloons.

Whatever happens in the next few weeks will be fascinating and I for one will be waiting to see what they have and which names they pick for him/her.

Good Luck Wills and Kate...............................................................Message for Kate..........Remember to do your pelvic floor exercises afterwards love.

Lots of love
Me
xxxx

18 comments:

  1. I'm glad I managed to sneak in and back out without the papps realising. I think she might give live tweet updates from the labour suite ha ;)

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    1. Wouldn't that be a hoot, fingers crossed xx

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  2. Hahahahaha oh I laughed my head off at the first bit imagining Kate (and then you!) with legs up on the dashboard. Maybe she'll be taken out with completely tinted windows?

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    1. My poor mum was driving us and she ran through every red light xx

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  3. Good advice there at the end, hope she's reading! Probably a good thing that One Born Every Minute isn't going to be allowed in, so Kate can let herself go and just be a woman like any other for the duration and scream the place down/groan elegantly/whatever she feels like doing.

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    1. I hope she's reading too. I agree....Just let yourself go Kate xx

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  4. lol i love it!! your birth sounds like mine where!! thanks for linking up with #magicmoments x

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    1. Not really my magic moment but It will be for Kate xxx

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  5. Can you imagine the bookies as well? No doubt pink/blue, weight, name choice all featuring heavily. Odds are... it will be... a baby! Leave the poor woman alone huh?!

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    1. I think your right.....................A baby it will be. xxx

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  6. I think it will be the most photographed baby yet!

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    1. God yes, and it wont be long before they start digging out all the pictures of Diana to see the resemblance xx

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  7. This made me laugh, I would LOVE to be able to see how her labour pans out...oh to be a fly on the wall!

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    1. I would love to see Wills reaction to the whole thing xx

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  8. Great post, made me laugh. The mind does boggle at how different her birth will be from ours. Fundamentally, she is a woman doing what women are programmed to do naturally and if she gives birth naturally, surely she will behave like the rest of us? I do hope she is allowed to do what is right for her as a woman and a mother and the baby as a baby, rather than the heir to the throne. I hope there isn't early intervention if she is able to do it as nature intended.

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  9. One of the very few things royals do that they can't get someone else to do for them. I imagine one gets a much better class of gas and air, though.

    Referring to the post above and natural birth, wasn't the 'feet in stirrups / lying on your back' method popularised by the nobility when it became fashionable for fathers to attend?

    Good luck, Kate and Wills. Whatever flavour you get I hope all goes well for mum and baby

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  10. I did laugh at the news on the radio this morning....as if no other woman had ever given birth before...

    'Get one an epidural...NOW!'

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  11. Lol I hope Wills doesn't use up her gas and air like my OH did!

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